Analogy of honeybee mentality and fly mentality works well to improve quality of life as well as quality of relationships.
Honeybee flies from flower to flower extracting the nectar without disturbing the flower. The mindset of honeybee is to seek the essence of each flower. Even if in a place filled with rotten garbage, rather than giving attention to all the filth, the honeybee keeps its focus in finding nectar and it eagerly flies to even find a single flower amidst miles and miles of garbage. In our relationships, we have much to learn from honeybee. It is teaching us the art of focusing on positives and dealing appropriately with faults in each other. There will be faults everywhere and in everyone. There is no shortage of things to complain about, but just as the honeybee seeks nectar even in the most unexpected of places, we can seek the positive qualities in those around us.
The fly represents another kind of mindset in a relationship. Although each species can be appreciated for its particular instinctive nature, still we can learn valuable lessons to improve the quality of our own lives. On an otherwise healthy body, the fly will focus on sucking an infectious scab. The fly will travel over a hundred of flowers, but it will focus on tasting garbage and excrement. It ignores the sweet fragrance of the Rose garden and even in the best of circumstances and in the tidiest places the fly will focus on the trash. This represents the mindset of ignoring the good qualities of those around us, and focusing on their faults. It is so easy, it requires no effort to see flaws in others. ‘Fault-finding’ is a habit, the more we give in to it, the more we become obsessed by it. In a relationship, it is important to have honest, well-wishing communication focused on appreciating the positive while dealing with the negatives in a gracious, constructive manner. Trying to bring out the best in each other. In doing so we learn to recognize the positive qualities within our own selves and to overcome unhealthy low self-esteem.
Honeybee mentality or fly mentality – the choice is yours.
Ref – This analogy is credited to ‘Radhanath Swamy’